Smile Talk

Bogor, Indonesia is a lovely little town nestled in the hills of Java about 2 hours south of Jakarta. While some natives speak a little English, most do not. Typically before I travel to a place where I don't speak the language, I'll at least get a few key phrases under my belt. 'Airport', 'water', 'bathroom', 'food', and 'thank you' will get you by just about anywhere. Taxi is pretty universal I've found & yes/no are pretty safe with head nods - unless you're in India, in which case the two seem to be reversed. On this trip though, 'thank you' was all I managed to tackle before I landed. As I write this, I can't help but feel a little ashamed admitting this to all 7 of my followers. Think what you will, but in my defense you have to consider how many phrases could one possibly need if 10 of the 12 days they're not allowed to speak anyway.

It always feels a little funny at first not being able to communicate verbally with someone you've just met. I'm an extrovert and incredibly curious about everything, so not being able to communicate can be pretty frustrating to say the least. It can also be dangerous - what did I just eat?, embarrassing - I'm 27 and about to pee in the middle of this shopping center - and dangerous - where is this taxi taking me? Equally, the person you are trying to communicate with may also be equally frustrated or embarrassed by the situation. However, I've come to find that those scenarios are typically more fears that people imagine about how the situation could turn out, and very rarely are actually how it turns out. I've been for the most part a mute in several countries, and each time when communicating comes into the equation it ends up being a very giving exchange with a much deeper connection. To quantify, I would say that 95% of the time, such a situation is empowering, joyful, and exciting to be a part of. It's pretty magical when both of us start relying on universal knowledge of human nature to tell a story or explain how delicious that fried ball of street meat was. You almost revert to a childlike exaggeration - like you're singing a song about the hungry bear who wants his dinner (motioning your hand to your mouth for hunger) and it's good (rubbing your hand on your tummy). It makes everyone laugh & feel good. By the way, the street meat is called tombor (sp?) - definitely get you some if you're ever in Indonesia.

I have been in this situation many many times, and will be honest that there is an adjustment period before that funny anxious feeling goes away. You have to find your comfort zone - for me it takes about a day. After that, I feel pretty comfortable, but everyone is different so get to know what your time frame is. After getting into the zone, you start to feel comfortable relying on your creative hand gestures and my favorite, the simple smile, to say what you need to, keeping it simple & sweet.

Today I went to the shopping mall in the heart of the city to pick up a few necessities. I'm staying at a lovely resort in a gated community and wanted to get a grasp of the heart of Bogor, as I suspect much of the city isn't going around goofing off all day at the pool or on the golf course like you tend to do in the resort. I got a shuttle into the winding roads towards the main part of town and started to get my bearings. Lots of motorbikes, many people walking, a large Muslim influence, and shops along the street are all mom & pop sheds mostly selling 7-11 items or food. After about 15 minutes we get to the grand shopping center called Giant and I get dropped off. It's equipped with just about anything you could need - including a Starbucks & A&W Rootbeer place that claimed 'Real American Food'. I spent a half hour walking around, figuring out the exchange rate and reading some awesome English t-shirts. Quickly the feeling like I was being the least adventurous person ever in this AC four story shopping mall/cinema complex, I decided to step out onto the bustling humid & hectic streets of the city to find it's heart. This is where the fun began...

I went looking for the beating heart, and there it was all around me loud and clear. I stopped by a group of tuk tuk (motorbike taxi's here, not pushbikes like the ones in Cambodia) drivers playing a game of chess and sat with them for a while, 'chatting' with smiles. I stopped and talked with a homeless elderly woman dawning the best smile I've ever seen with her small child on a busy street overpass and took a wonderful shot of the two of them all via smiles. There were some construction workers threading a giant rubber pipe through the ground and we had great fun conversing all with smiles. I was given some tombor to try for free and sat around with a few men in their 50s and their wives while a little girl played with the hacky sack I gave her - all of which most of the conversation was done via smile talk.

I think I spoke all of 10 sentences today - most of which weren't being understood from my words, but rather my smile and maybe some pretty sweet hand gestures. Today made me very happy, and my cheeks even hurt a little.

Today take time to smile & as always, be happy. **)

Z